Perceptions

I am so thankful for my opportunity to be the Education/Mission Trip Coordinator for Hope for Korah. It's a privilege that I take very seriously. I've struggled for months with a back injury that I felt had limited me. As others planned further trips to Ethiopia, I was feeling at a real loss as I knew that I was staying behind. I wanted so badly to go back to Korah. More than occasionally, I reminded myself that my perception of being held back was just that, "my perception". As months have gone by and I've really taken a long, hard look at all that I have experienced in Ethiopia over the last two years, I realized that nothing was stopping me from pressing on in my advocacy of the poor. Advocacy didn't have to mean going to Ethiopia (although I'd love to be on that plane in August!). Advocacy meant being a voice for the poor and my voice was as loud and clear here as it would be there. My perceptions of "restriction" were becoming just that...a restriction to my potential service to the people of Korah. So, I made the commitment to dive into what I love - learning and bringing awareness to others. I decided to do what I could, even if it would start out small, but to do it with all my heart. And, what a better way to do that than through imparting knowledge about poverty to volunteers that are about to embark on a transformative journey of a lifetime. Perceptions. That's what we struggle with as we attempt to understand poverty too. As North Americans, we think that we understand what poverty really looks like. No food, no water, no clothes, no health care, no school, no income. This is our mostly material view of poverty. But, poverty embodies so much more than that. Poverty has a face. Poverty's face has a heart and that heart feels poverty on a very deep level. The best way to know what poverty looks like and how it feels is to ask the poor themselves. We may think that going on a mission's trip will give us a full understanding of poverty. In reality, it will give us a tiny glimpse. We will see the pain, the suffering and the injustice. But, we will also return to our own comforts and securities. If we are students, school will await us and opportunities will meet us every day. If we are adults, our families will be provided for and our sense of safety, security and other aspects of our life are unlikely to waver. After a trip to an impoverished community, we will never have to stay there in the circumstances and suffering of the poor and continue enduring as they do. We get the "quick peek" at poverty, without ever having to truly “feel” its oppression. The poor get a "lifetime" of its grip. And so, what do the poor say about poverty? Yes, they hunger for food and thirst for water. They wish that they had medical care that was easily accessible and free. They don’t like having tattered clothes or their loved ones getting sick. They wish their kids could go to school. But even more so, they crave dignity, hope, and opportunity. They want to be acknowledged and deeply loved. They are tired of feeling like a lost cause. They don’t want to feel forgotten. They could do away with shame, fear, abandonment, isolation, desperation, and the feeling of being trapped in an ongoing no win situation. They want to have a voice…that is heard and respected. Do we think that our perceptions of poverty will bring them what they need? Yes, we can bring water and food. Yes, we can bring clothes and build homes and schools. But, how do we build self-confidence and self-reliance? How do we take away the pain and darkness of shame? How do we overcome hopelessness? Is it possible that we must empower ourselves in the process as well? But, with what you ask? To be effective servants of the poor, we must equip ourselves with a deep knowledge of their culture, their values, their political structures, their social networks, and the true reasons for their lack of access and opportunities. We can try to "help" to bring them what we think they need. But, isn't it best to ask them what they need rather than assuming that we know best? Then we can serve them from that place of true understanding. The poor are poor in spirit because they do not feel empowered. Empower a people and you will surely see the riches of the poor. You will see the richness of their many gifts, talents and bountiful community resources. Transform your perceptions with a solid education on poverty and you will begin to bring change to the world. Knowledge is power. And that's why I'm so grateful to be in this place of serving the people of Korah from a distance. I can help to impart the truth behind poverty issues and development. I can help to equip others to serve out of a knowledge that will truly empower the powerless and the voiceless. I could believe the perception that I am sitting here, held back at a distance. But, I choose to believe the truth, which is that my heart is already there in Korah. I can’t get much closer than that! I can serve with an open heart, hands stretched out thanking God for the opportunity to love His people, as He has asked me to do.

Can you imagine?

Can you imagine what it's like to crouch down on the floor,
with mud for walls and dusty floors and stomachs with no more?
And just a tiny slit in the mud, cracks down a ray of light,
But on those stormy cold wet nights, there's no comfort close in sight.

Can you imagine what it's like to have no food and scrounge it every day?
To walk barefoot to the dump because mother has no pay.
And pick up rotten fruits and meat that no one else will eat
It's either this or spend the day begging on the street.

And did you know we have no water to wash or cook or drink?
Only the water falling from the sky into our dirty old bucket sink.
To get water we have to walk an hour and a half away,
And even then, that's only if we have money with which to pay.
And if we send our children, we pray they'll be alright,
It can be just as scary as the things that happen in our nights.

Can you imagine what it's like to watch your loved ones die?
Afflicted with curable diseases taken long before their time.
And did you know that often times in shallow graves they lay?
Right in our homes, beneath our feet, that's where they have to stay.

Can you imagine what it's like to be outcast and alone?
While others think that we are cursed and still would throw out stones?
God, I cry out! I've been told that I'm loved and I am yours,
Then, please bring your love, your hope, and your light,
Through our darkened crumbling doors.

Today, I saw some people I've never ever seen!
No one has ever dared to come. I don't know how long it's been.
They walked along the rain drenched roads, reaching out to touch.
No one has ever done that...the warmth, it meant so much.

They even came inside our homes and cared enough to pray,
And this made our hearts to feel that hope was one its' way.
They've come to fill our many needs, every day there's something more.
It revives our souls to see that God has so much more in store.

Their love, it shows Lord, that you're more than able to provide for all our needs,
And for those out there that just don't know, we pray you'll plant the seeds.
May they be able to give up comforts, so that we may merely live,
Willing hearts and serving hands, that's all they need to give.

And now we know we're not alone, forgotten and secluded.
God is bringing His love to Korah and everyone's included.
For God so loved the world that He gave up His only Son,
That all might be free with life overflowing - each and every one.

Angie Appenheimer
August 2010 - after my trip to Korah last year

A God of wonders

Just over a year ago, I was in Korah. As I read Eve's blog (www.hopeforkorah.blogspot.com), I marvel at all that the Lord has done in Korah. I also marvel at how He got us to Korah, through incredible circumstances, that at the time, seemed very bizarre and unexpected. He took us through volcanoes erupting, lost luggage, failed plans and then some! Unexpected to us...not to God! Around the time of the time of the Imagine Adoption bankruptcy, a staff member there passed along the name of an organization that would have a team in Sululta, the same town that our team was to visit on our planned medical missions trip. At the time, I remember feeling quite discouraged with all that had gone on with Imagine. I didn't even feel like I had the emotional energy to pursue this contact. I filed the contact with merely a quick glance of the first name. Months later, as I organized my email folder, I came across that same email. I had already heard of this organization and looked at their website. God hinted to me that this was worth pursuing - even though I had "filed" it along ago. I contacted the lady and had a great conversation about our upcoming and plans for our time there. In our discussions, I mentioned that I was a little leary of staying in local accomodation in Sululta for reasons of safety, etc. She suggested that I contact the Ethiopia Guest House. Their organization had stayed there and was very pleased. The drive back and forth to Sululta was going to be a long one from Addis where the Guest house was situated...and so I gave it much thought and prayer. The distance and possible incoveniences didn't seem to make much sense. At the same time, something in my heart continued to pursue the thought.

I finally contacted the Guest House owner and knew right away that this was the place that we were to be - distant from our mission or not. Funny how God works! Our trip in Sululta didn't work out. We ended up spending our remaining time in Korah....right in Addis! In planning for the team, I remember asking the Guest House owner if he could give me some ideas of where to take the team so that they could experience a full view of poverty. He gave me about 10 suggestions. As I glanced over the many ideas, "Korah" caught my eye. A leper community by a trash dump? I couldn't even grasp what would this would be like. A few days after our arrival, I asked the receptionist to get us a driver so that we could go to Korah. "Korah? Where's that?" she said. And so, on that very special, God-ordained day, we travelled into Korah for what would become a life changing experience. Before our arrival in Korah, only a few had entered into Korah from the outside world. Ours was the first medical team. For 75 years, Korah had sat on the edge of the trash dump feeling alone and forgotten. Entering into Korah not only opened our eyes wide open to the harsh realities of impoverishment, it opened our hearts deeply to the love that God has for His people. In this last year, God has moved powerfully in Korah. He has brought immense love, hope and a future to a place that seemed unknown and forgotten. Team after team has come to extend their hands, feet and hearts in service. There is now a sponsorship program for 250 children. A family sponsorship program has begun. There is a nutritional program, income generation.....and so much more. The possibilities are endless...just like the love of God! It is so evident to me that no plan or desire of our hearts is left untended by the Lord. He took our desire to love and care for the people of Ethiopia to new and un-chartered places. He used us to reach out with His unfailing love. He is truly a God of wonders!

Feeding the poor

I just love this picture. Not only do I know who the people are, I've met them...in Korah. Sammy (the server) is a young man who God has called to lead the community of Korah. He used to live at the garbage dump himself. God took hold of him and he has been serving his community faithfully. This poor old man is unable to feed himself. Some days, he can't get out of bed. I remember meeting him in his home. His room is dark, and very dirty. He lays at night on a bed made of layers of dirty clothes and blankets. He does have a window, but it is very difficult for him to turn around and enjoy what's out there. To see him being served is a true joy. And to see Jesus, right there with him, leaves an even more powerful impression on my heart and soul. Jesus loves the lepers. He loves the prostitutes, the mothers with HIV, the orphans, even the men that get drunk at night who feel entirely trapped and hopeless with their destitution. Jesus is there right now in Korah serving the poor...through my friends Eve and Dave, through the countless many that have left the comforts of their home to serve the poor. And when we step out of our comforts to do this...we are serving Jesus Himself. My heart is full of joy. It is deeply connected in a way I can't describe.
I guess that I feel the joy, the hope, and the love of God...for each of my dear brothers and sisters in Korah. God bless them all.

God is SO good

I can't think of any other title that would better fit this post. I've had the incredible joy of reading a post from the Hope for Korah blog that my friend Eve created. She is now there in Ethiopia in Korah after a full year of working tirelessly to plan for her return. As I read through the post and saw the pictures, my heart was completely flooded with emotions. Beylanesh, a leper who a year ago lived in a dark, dingy, and filthy shack which was no more than 10x10, was now living in a larger, much brighter home, nicely decorated with the pictures that Eve had sent over the last year. Beylanesh herself had sheer joy written all over her face. I couldn't believe the difference in this woman! Not only did she look joyful, she had the look of hope in her eyes and in her smile. Her children no longer looked downtrodden. Last year, none of them smiled. They looked down or looked away, with what I imagined would be deep shame or sorrow. But now, one year later, with the love and hope that Eve had given them over the last year, they smiled big smiles, their eyes gleamed and there again, I saw HOPE, clear as day.

It is very hard to put into words how this makes my heart feel. Two years ago, I went to Ethiopia for the first time. Inspired by the beautiful people of Ethiopia and their incredibly difficult plight, I promised myself, and them, that I would return to journey with them in the beginning steps of changing their world...one step and one person at a time. A year later I returned with a team of 8. While our original plans were to serve at a rural medical clinic, we instead were directed to Korah. In Korah, my heart sank to its absolute depths. I could not come to grips with the immeasurable destitution that thousands of people accepted as their daily reality and fate. We stepped into these dark shacks that I spoke of and entered momentarily into the worlds of the poor. Nothing will ever compare to those moments in my life. Nothing will motivate me more to be a change in our broken world than those dear, poor people. And so, when I read Eve's stories and see her pictures, my heart leaps out in gratitude. It leaps out with joy for Eve, as she witnesses first hand the incredible difference that she has made in the lives of Beylanesh and her family. My heart fills with gratitude as I come to more fully comprehend the immense love of God for each and every person in Korah. Not one person thereis forgotten. That God would love so personally and so deeply is utterly amazing to me. I am in awe that God would stretch out His hand across continents to love the people of Korah through willing servants. I feel so humbled and blessed...and eager to be but one of those servants.

Life is not always comfortable. As much as we would love it to be that way, it just isn't. The popular world view is that we can take control of our life, and direct it however we choose. But the fact is, that our lives are not directed by our plans. And if we've experienced hardships, we can be particularly tempted to retreat into a variety of emotional disconnects. We can run away from pain and discomforts, we can hide from them, or we can pretend that we've got everything under control...not even feeling a need to take notice of the world around us. That's called complacency and it is the affliction of our current generation. And then, if something comes along to challenges us, that perhaps asks us to reach beyond our comfort zone, it's just so easy for us to say, "That's not for me"...."I'd like to live my life within my own parameters....safely, comfortably, with no pain. Don't ask me to go there." Again, life is not like that. I remember going to Korah, Ethiopia, the leper colony of 130,000 last April. I walked into the world of mind boggling destitution, HIV, TB, leprosy, filth. It was unbelievably overwhelming. And there might have been a part of me that could have chosen to stay "safe" and not even go in, or not to look as closely. Or perhaps, I could have looked closely, but not allowed things to grip my heart. I could have chosen to be a "visitor" and then walk away back into my comfortable world. I could have said, "Boy, that was utterly horrible, but it's just so much bigger than me...there's nothing I can do." We can't walk through life like that. And it doesn't have to be out of the example of walking through an African slum. It can be right in our own family, our own neighborhood, in the midst of our own personal struggles. We can't go through life, just "hanging on for dear life" and not engaging what we see, hear and feel. Even in our struggles, especially in our struggles, is the opportunity to grow, to change, and to see the world through God's eyes. We have the incredible opportunity, as we leap out beyond ourselves, to reach out to others in a very profound way. We will have done it by letting go of ourselves, even in our most difficult situations, and made the decision to take our life, put it out there and make our worlds a better place. Watch this video below. This is exactly how we can live our lives...."hanging on for "dear safe life", behind the disguise of safety and comfort. And if we think that this is truly living, then we have a few things to think about.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner...

So many options. Funny thing is that we determine breakfast, lunch and dinner by the time of day that we eat and the foods that we eat. So, for breakfast, you'd eat cereal with milk, maybe some fruit. Or, you could eat bacon and eggs with toast and orange juice. Lunch? Well, a light lunch with soup and a sandwich or maybe just some yoghurt and fruit if you're conserving on calories. Ok, breakfast runs between 7am and maybe 10am if you're a late starter. Lunch? Well, the conventional time is noon. And, if you want to get really spoiled as far as choices, you can do "brunch". Dinner is generally a heavier meal and around 5 to 7pm. This morning I had the luxury of sleeping in (which I NEVER do) and got out of bed at 10am. I was finished eating eggs and toast around 11:30am. Then, someone said, "That's not breakfast, that's lunch!" What difference does it make?

Here's what I thought. Really, we have the privilege of choosing not only what we ?eat, but when we eat it. We can choose a late or light breakfast. We can choose an early or late breakfast or brunch. We can choose any and ALL the details of our daily food intake. We never go hungry and yet we hear our kids say things like, "I'm starving...what's for snack? Snack? Yes, another time that we can choose to eat YET AGAIN. Wonder where this is going? Well, maybe we should just be plain grateful that we get to eat and not worry so much about fussing over all the details. Whether breakfast is early or late, small or big, we will NEVER have to scrounge for our food. We will most likely NEVER experience not having choices. We will never know what it feels like to be "starving". So, today when I ate my "breakfast" eggs at 11:00am, I realized how grateful I was to be able to HAVE choice, nutritious foods and the privilege of choosing how often I could eat.

It made me think of the poor men, women and children in the Addis slum of Korah....and the many slums all over the world, where there is no breakfast, lunch and dinner. There's just an empty stomach and no where to go...but to a place of despair and disease. And please, let's not forget that when we do take our luxuries and privileges for granted, that we are dishonoring those that don't have all that we do. Even better, maybe we could eat a little more conservatively. We could even get healthier in the process. Then, we could go the extra mile give the extra money that we saved to the poor! Now that sounds like a great meal plan!

A walk in the park..

Yesterday, I went for a nice long trail walk. As I entered the serenity of nature, I asked myself this question, "Why is it that I have the incredible privilege of taking this walk? I can take my time soaking in the sun, breathing in the fresh air and taking in all of nature's delights" It might seem like a silly question, but have we ever really considered all that we take for granted in our lives? Things as simple as a walk? We have the privilege of walking for leisure whenever we choose. Walking is enjoyable, relaxing and a real treat as we take in nature's many sounds and sights. Ever thought of what a walk represents in the poorest of countries? It is straining and arduous. There is no no relaxation or leisure when your walk is for sheer survival. There is no comfort in carrying huge bales of bamboo on your back up a steep mountain road several times a day. There is no comfort in carrying 50 pound containers of water on your head, as you walk on crumbling roads barefoot,for one and a half hours in each direction. It breaks a mother's heart to watch her children have to do it too. There is no comfort in walking in the pouring rain to the local garbage dump to scrounge for the family's daily meal. I've never appreciated walking to the extent that I do now. It is yet another luxury that I enjoy with complete freedom that others will never have. So, next time you're out for a leisurely walk, remember those that don't have the privileges that we do. Keep them in your prayers. And if you are so led, consider taking a small part in their lives. There are so many ways that you can make a difference. The journey of giving to others starts with a heart willing to beat beyond itself. One step at a time....one person at a time, we CAN make a difference. Potentially, we could eliminate those discouraging walks to the dump. We COULD help to bring clean water to places like Korah. We COULD bring hope to others. We may not be able to go there and do it with our own hands and feet, but we could take a "walk" of faith, reach out and journey alongside them to a place of greater prosperity. All walks are done one step at a time!

Oh, my aching back...

Today I had a physio appointment for my back. I was told that I should do some traction while I was there, so on to a table I hopped and got strapped in so that 35kg could pull on my hips and relieve some disc compression. It wasn't the most fun thing to do. As I lay there, I had a 2 way path of thoughts. "Boy, this is something else. Why is my back so sore? When is it going to get better? How much longer? Physio is so expensive...etc, etc." Then the flip side to that. " "Boy, I can't imagine being someone in the leper colony of Korah, in Addis Ethiopia. I can't imagine hauling boulders all day long for 50 cents a day. I can't imagine the kind of sore back that would give me, or the sore back that I'd have from walking 1 1/2 hours to get my water every single day. What would it feel like to work hard every single day with my hands, picking out rotten food from the dump so that I could feed my kids. I can't imagine what it would be like not to have a doctor to see, much less a physiotherapist. What am I thinking? Ok, now that I've walked that train of thought, I can realign myself to a more realistic reality. My circumstances will NEVER be as bad as those poor people that I met last year. It's not a bad thing to have the privilege of being able to get better here in North America, but we must never forget how blessed we are, or how very much others struggle. With a focus on recovering ourselves, mentally, physically, spiritually, we can focus our strengths and abilities toward caring for those we love including our families and our friends. But, may we never for one moment forget those that need us desperately in other places, like Korah in Ethiopia. And remember, there are Korahs all over the world, even in our own cities. In wholeness, may we never take our health, opportunities, talents or abilities for granted. In wholeness, may we choose to take the focus off ourselves and bless the world, one person at a time.

No sitting required...

I recently stepped down from my position at Hope Adoption. This was a very difficult decision for me since I have loved journeying with people in their adoptions. Hope was also the springboard for my glimpse into true impoverishment. It opened my eyes and my heart to the immense destitution that exists in our world by introducing me to my travels to Ethiopia in 2009 and 2010. Life hasn't been the same since.

I injured my back in November and recovery has been slow. Sitting makes recovery even more slow. So, in order to focus on recovering my back and to give more time to my family, I decided to step down. I have to admit that this back issue sure felt very restrictive to me. Christmas holidays were difficult without the ability to sit and visit alot. Long car rides were out of the question. Even resuming car rides to school for my kids in the New Year seemed to exact alot of effort. I was feeling very disillusioned with my perceived inabilities.

If I couldn't sit, how could I possibly do all the things that I loved to do? Things like my journeying with people in their adoptions or their life events, sitting at my desk journalling, spending time at my dining room table coming up with creative ideas to continue advocating for the poor in a leper colony in Ethiopia where I had travelled. How could I sit and enjoy a cup of coffee with friends if my sitting was limited to 30 minutes before I had to get up? How could I drive down the Oregon Coast with my family? How would I be able to go back to Ethiopia, on a plane ride of over 24 hours? I was discouraged.

Then, today I gained a new perspective. As I stood and watched a video about a Haitian orphanage ministry at my kitchen counter, I realized that there were many more ways of doing things than what I was used to or comfortable with. I realized that God didn't require me to "sit" to do His work. He simply required my heart to be engaged.

If I couldn't sit, then I could stand. If I couldn't stand or sit when my back was sore, then I could speak and share with others of the many opportunities to engage impoverishment and help to change the world...one small detail at a time. If for some reason I couldn't talk, then I could go for a quiet walk, sharing my desires for restoration and hope with the Lord. If I couldn't sit, stand, talk or walk, then I could pray for the multitudes of forgotten and impoverished people in the world. I could intercede on their behalf and pray that others would stand in the gap of justice, jump off from sitting on the fence of good intent, speak and share the realities of poverty and the truths of hope and restoration. Sitting wasn't required to share in the joys of life with my family and friends.

So, not being to sit really didn't mean much. It wasn't restrictive at all. The reality is that my heart can be fully alive with the compassion and love that is needed in this world. God will direct the rest of my steps. No sitting required.